Continuing: The Dark Road

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[ 98] Nymaya: Continuing: The Dark Road
Tue Dec 14 17:03:46 2010
To: All New_Thalos ( Reklah Crelius ) Dar'shin Keylan Jadess ( Cayenna Necrucifer RP Imm )
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The differing climates - from the harsh barren desert, the bitter frozen wastes to the lush green forests - were often far more comforting to be amongst, if only because each extreme offered her consolation and an escape. She'd spent many years between each; haunting the long rain-swept lands of Iagothal with its dark forests and its rocky regions, traversing the snowy plains of Icewall with all its perils, patrolling the vibrant emerald Vallenwood and now, gazing out on a desert that stretched on for countless sun-baked miles.

The desert had taken her once when she had offered it her life and somehow, she had survived. In her heart, she believed that it was simply not her time yet, though she'd come back to New Thalos bearing a weariness of the world upon her shoulders and an impending sense of dark purpose.

She'd found ways to cope, until the day she'd come face to face with azure eyes and the dark of her path had been briefly illuminated. She'd known then that she had at least one last purpose, though whether her God looked down and saw, she knew not. She'd told herself, with each step forward, that at least this was better. Better than waiting, better than grieving, than spending the rest of her life tormented by the questions that could never have been answered by any but...him.

She'd told herself - and her God - that she could do whatever was required of her.

Could she still?

She stared out over the city from her room, a hand curved protectively over the swell of her stomach - now visible about the cloth flaps of the silksteel jacket she had adopted to suit the pregnancy - and felt a small spike of doubt and a longing to lose herself in the wild again.

She was not to know peace. Her life had been destined for hardship, for warfare and a dark path, early on. She had come to accept this. Did that mean she had the right, even as their mother, to decide a similar - if not a darker - path for her children?

It was too deep a question and she knew what some people would say, and what others would say. In the end, she also knew...what her answer would be, but she shied away from that. It was enough right now that she continue, that she take each day for what it offered and do her best to care for the lives growing inside her.

If she could do nothing else, if she had nothing else, at least there was that. Time would bring about the rest. She felt her soul stir at that thought and knew, in the oldest part of herself, that Linot might have agreed.